Jokes

Frog: Tumhare paas dimaag nahin hai.
Santa: Hai.
Frog: Nahin hai.
Santa: Hai.
Frog: Nahin hai & jumps into the well.
Santa: Isme suicide karne waali kya baat thi.?

Who fired the Shot
A 90-year-old man was having his annual checkups.
The doctor asked him how he was feeling.

" I've never been better," the old man replied." I've got a twenty-year-old bride who's pregnant & is about to deliver a child. What is your opinion about that, Doc?" the old man asked.

The doctor thought for a moment, then says, " Well, let me tell you a story. I know a guy who is a hunter. He never misses a season for hunting.But, one day he's in a bit of a hurry and he accidentally grabs his umbrella instead of his gun ".

The doctor continued, " So he's walking in the woods near a creek, and suddenly he spots a lion in some bush in front of him. He raises up his umbrella, points it at the lion and squeezes the handle.
BAM! The lion drops dead in front of him ."

That's impossible !" said the old man in disbelief. Someone else must have shot that lion.
" Exactly" Said the Doc



Santa joined NASA. After one month the Americans had to change the name fromNASA to SATYANASA

Santa apni girl friend ko I Luv U kehta hai ayour gir jata hai.
Gal: Yeh kya kar rahe ho?
Santa: I'm falling in love

In an interview,
Interviewer: How does an electric motor run?
Santa: Dhhuuuyourrrrrrrrrr. ....
Inteviewer shouts: Stop it.
Santa: Dhhuyourrrr dhup dhup dhup...



Dear Husband
I'm writing you this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you for good. I'veBeen a good woman to you for seven years and I have nothing to show for it.These last two weeks have been hell. Your boss called to tell me that you Had quit your job today and that was the last straw. Last week, you came Home and didn't notice that I had gotten my hair and nails done, cooked your Favorite meal and even wore a brand new negligee.
You came home and ate in Two minutes, and went straight to sleep after watching the game. You don't Tell me you love me anymore, you don't touch me or anything Either you're Cheating or you don't love me anymore, whatever the case is, I'm gone.
P.S. If you're trying to find me, don't. Your BROTHER and I are moving away To West Virginia together!
Have a great life!
Your Ex-wife


Dear Ex-Wife
Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It's true that you and I have been married for seven years, although a good woman is a far cry from what you've been. I watch sports so much to try to drown out your constant nagging. Too bad that doesn't work. I did notice when you cut off all of your hair last week, the first thing that came to mind was "You Look just like a man!" My mother raised me to not say anything if you can't say anything nice. When you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY BROTHER, because I stopped eating pork seven years ago. I went to sleep on you when you had on that new negligee because the price tag was still on it. I prayed that it was a coincidence that my Brother had just borrowed fifty dollars from me that morning and your Negligee was $49.99.

After all of this, I still loved you and felt that we could work it out. So when I discovered that I had hit the lotto for ten Million dollars, I quit my job and bought us two tickets to Jamaica. But When I got home you were gone. Everything happens for a reason I guess. I hope you have the filling life you always wanted. My lawyer said with your letter that you wrote, you won't get a dime from me. So take care.
P.S. I don't know if I ever told you this but Carl, my brother was bornCarla. I hope that's not a problem.